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Marketing news and other sick stuff | Issue #18

Instead of the traditional dark-colored Western suit, the hot fashion among Korean businessmen is the Bill Gates look, complete with Gates glasses, the Gates plaid shirt, the Gates wrinkle-free pants and the Gates unpolished shoes. Choi Hyun Chul, president of Sun Internet Inc., says of his new style, "I don’t care if I look geeky. I believe this is the way to dress to be successful." Another Gates wannabe, Yoo Do Wook, founder of KDB Corp., says that friends have told him the new wardrobe makes him "look like a farmer," but he remains committed: "I can justify the way I dress by telling them that it’s the Gates look." To capitalize on the Gates craze, one of Korea’s major clothing manufacturers, Cheil Industries, is working on a line of geek wear that will incorporate both Gates’s everyday look and his antitrust look; says a Cheil designer, "Bill Gates has been appearing in court wearing shoulder-pad-free jackets." (Wall Street Journal, 1/4/01)

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In an attempt to conceal the obvious, the FBI has renamed its Internet surveillance system "DCS (Digital Collection System) 1000" because its original name, "Carnivore," sounded predatory and invasive. (Wall Street Journal, 2/9/01)

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One contestant on Fox’s Temptation Island explained his enthusiasm for the show: "It’s like being able to go down and take part in the Pepsi Challenge, but have ladies be the actual soft drink." (USA Today, 1/10/01)

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ABOVE: The Doherty High School yearbook staff and the cover of its yearbook, which includes neither the school name nor class year.

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Although purchasers of SUVs and minivans are pretty much the same demographically (affluent married couples in their forties with children), the two vehicles are designed and marketed according to automakers’ perceptions of deep psychological differences between them. Interviews with designers and marketers at Ford, DaimlerChrysler, and other car companies reveal:

Sport utility buyers tend to be more restless, more sybaritic, less social people who are "self-oriented," and who have strong conscious or subconscious fears of crime. Minivan buyers tend to be more self-confident and more "other-oriented"–more involved with family, friends, and their communities.

"Minivan people want to be in control in terms of safety, being able to park and maneuver in traffic, being able to get elderly people in and out," said Fred J. Schaafsma of General Motors. "SUV owners want to be more like, ‘I’m in control of the people around me.’ " That’s one of the reasons why seats are mounted higher in sport utilities than in minivans.

Sport utility buyers are much more concerned with their vehicles’ external appearance, while minivan buyers are more interested in the vehicles’ interiors and practicality, according to Thomas Elliott of Honda. David C. McKinnon of Daimler-Chrysler said that the company’s highest executives had told him repeatedly to "get [SUV drivers] up in the air and make them husky." For the minivan, he said, the goal was an attractive interior that would make buyers feel as if they were once again "in the womb." (New York Times, 7/17/00)

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In fall 2000, schools around the country received 13 million textbook covers that said "Think. Don't Smoke." The covers also bore their sponsor's logo: Philip Morris. This double message has caused at least one state, California, to send the covers back. Even Advertising Age noted that the ostensible antismoking messages looked "alarmingly like a colorful pack of cigarettes." (Christian Science Monitor, 12/5/00)

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In the latest boom in business books, publishers are attributing management advice to fictional characters and historical figures who have nothing whatsoever to do with the corporate world. To wit: Machiavelli on Modern Leadership (St. Martin’s); Never Give a Sucker an Even Break: W. C. Fields on Business (Prentice Hall); Beep! Beep! Competing in the Age of the Road Runner (Warner Books), which seeks to help managers be more like the bird and less like Wile E. Coyote; Make It So: Leadership Lessons from Star Trek, the Next Generation (Pocket Books); and Goldilocks on Management (Amacom), in which fairy tales like Chicken Little are retold with morals "for serious managers." The lesson behind Chicken Little, who feared the sky was falling? "Control rumors with timely, accurate, and effective communication." (Wall Street Journal, 3/3/00)

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Gun companies like Remington and Colt are now endorsing computer games marketed to kids, many of which feature weapons sold by the companies and come with digital and print gun catalogs. One game, called Remington Top Shot, features human targets (called "interactive targets") for the player to shoot. Colt’s Wild West Shootout tells the player, "You’re the law and you carry the firepower to back it up." (Associated Press, 12/14/00)

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As it explores the party’s marketing potential, the Republican National Committee is considering a GOP-branded Visa card. An internal study predicts that a "GOP Club" affinity group could yield revenue of $120 million and profit of up to $30 million. The club’s wares could range from "I worked the Florida Recount" coffee mugs to magazines, insurance, estate-planning services, or GOP-branded credit cards. Says GOP Chairman Nicholson, "To be a twenty-first century organization we need professional management of the GOP brand." Democratic officials won’t be turning their party into a branding opportunity, not because they don’t like the idea–it’s just that their internal reviews have found that a Democratic Party brand wouldn’t be successful. (Wall Street Journal, 1/17/01)

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iGrandparents.com, the "leading website focused on enriching the grandparent/grandchild relationship," has introduced a feature called "COINcidentally, I Love You." To teach "children as young as age 3 the importance and process of correspondence and saving money," the company equates writing Gramps with making money. "Grandparents attach a few small coins to the first card, add a message, and mail the package to their grandchild. Children get a piggy bank, a rhyming book that explains the ‘game,’ and the first card in a series along with a matching card for coloring. The coins go into the piggy bank, and the matching card is colored and returned. Once grandma or grandpa receives the picture, they send another card . . . with more coins." (iGrandparents.com press release)

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A Hokkaido University study of 150 people aged 20 to 35 found that more than one in ten are suffering severe memory problems. Researchers attribute the memory loss to increasing reliance on computer technology, which diminishes use of the brain to work out problems and also causes "information overload," making it difficult to distinguish between important and unimportant facts. (Sunday Times [U.K.], 2/4/01)

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CEO hopefuls are getting a Scared Straight curriculum in the MBA program at Pepperdine: students visit prisons to get lectured by convicted white-collar criminals. Says James T. Martinoff, the finance professor who created the program, many of the inmates "have the same drives and ambitions that they [the students] do, but maybe went a little too far." After thirteen years of running the program, Martinoff calls the program a success because, to his knowledge, no participant has ever been arrested. On the other hand, he says that in previous years students seeking help raising funds for their entrepreneurial efforts have called upon two of his ex-convict guest lecturers–Mark Morze, who helped swindle more than $70 million from investors in the carpet-cleaning business ZZZZ Best Co.; and Ted Wolfram, a former stockbroker from Toledo, Ohio, who served ten years for embezzling approximately $50 million. "It’s as if they forget that these are ex-felons and are won over by their charisma," Prof. Martinoff says. "Not everybody gets the message that we want them to have." (Wall Street Journal, 10/10/00)

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Real estate agents in Massachusetts are now studying the results of the MCAS, the state’s standardized test, to predict "test-flight." School districts that score badly on the MCAS are likely to have houses for sale as parents try to move their kids to schools with better scores, while high scores show which districts will appeal to homebuyers. (AP, 12/1/00)

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You call this simple? We received the following unsolicited email from Alternatives for Simple Living (now with e-commerce!) on 12/15/00:

[Alternatives for Simple Living] now offers an "eStore" or Shopping Cart on our website! This allows you to order resources without keying the information into an order form. While in the eStore, just click on the item. You can view the items in your shopping cart anytime. You can also remove items before actually placing the order. To reach Alternatives’ eStore, use the drop down menu on our Home Page; eStore appears under Resources. Or click on Site Map, then eStore. Or click on Catalog, then eStore. Or go directly . . . If you want to browse, use the many eStore subject headings. If you know a title or a word in a title, then use the eStore search function. The eStore and the Master Catalog have the same contents. Eventually the Master Catalog will go away.

We currently have a trade with Mother Jones magazine. They are running a promotion for our new title "Simple Living 101." In return we are urging our e-readers to visit their website to subscribe to their free weekly e-newsletter called "MOJOURNAL" and to consider subscribing to the magazine, a leader in investigative, progressive journalism since 1976.

For excerpts from "Whose Birthday Is It, Anyway?" featuring Miriam Therese Winter, visit www.SimpleLiving.org. To read the entire booklet, order a copy on paper (NOW HALF PRICE) . . . In addition to the on-going specials on our website, we offer the following seasonal specials: "Sustainable Change: Hope for a Simpler Millennium: Advent-Christmas Calendar Bulletin Insert in English or Spanish. Normally $1 each or 50 for $5. Now half price . . .

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George W. Bush, a comedian? It’s a funny thing about the President: his attempts at humor are among the most truthful, most revealing things that come out of his mouth. The following examples of Bush’s wit appear in Mark Crispin Miller’s new book, The Bush Dyslexicon* (W. Norton, 2001):

"Show me the money!"–upon seeing two lobbyists walking down the steps at the Capitol. (Texas Monthly, June 1999)

"[You’re all] going to hell."–asked what he would say to Israeli Jews upon arriving in the Middle East (Austin-American Statesman, 12/1/98)

"If this were a dictatorship, it’d be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I’m the dictator."–meeting with congressional leaders (CNN, 12/18/00)

"Thank you all very much. This is an impressive crowd, the have’s, and the have more’s. Some people call you the elite. I call you my base."–at the Al Smith Dinner (Fox News, 10/19/00)

"At one of these governor’s conferences, George turns to me and says, ‘What are they talking about?’
I said, ‘I don’t know.’
He said, ‘You don’t know anything, do you?’
And I said, ‘Not one thing.’
He said, ‘Neither do I.’ And we kind of high-fived."
–New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson (AP, 5/31/00)

"I propose that every city has a telephone number 119–for dyslexics who have an emergency."–to Republicans at an Alfafa Club meeting (Washington Post, 2/2/98)

"We’ve talked a lot about our economic plans and my opponent keeps saying I give too much tax relief to the top one percent, but he hadn’t heard my latest proposal. The bottom 99 percent will do well when they get to split Dick Cheney's stock options."–at the Al Smith Dinner (Fox News, 10/19/00)

"A lot of folks don’t think I can string a sentence together so when I was able to do so, the expectations were so low, all I had to do was say, ‘Hi, I’m George W. Bush.’ "–on David Letterman (Washington Post, 11/4/00)

David Fink, Hartford Courant: "When you’re not talking politics, what do you and [your father] talk about?"
George W.: "Pussy."–at the 1988 Republican Convention (Salon, 4/9/00)

"Desert Storm–we sold a lot of tickets."–asked about the advantages of being George Bush’s son (Larry King Live, 8/16/92)

George W. Bush admitted he was guilty of a fly-by shooting when he mistakenly killed a bird that is on the protected-species list. Bush received a $130 misdemeanor fine. "I killed a killdee," confessed Bush, who was hunting with a borrowed 20-gauge shotgun on the opening day of dove season. "I thought it was a dove." What Bush actually killed was a killdeer, known colloquially as a killdee because that is the cry the tiny plover makes.

Asked the difference between a killdee and a killdeer, Bush said, "One’s dead and one’s alive." (Houston Chronicle, 9/2/94